There once lived a Creature . . .
. . . who grew a giant bonsai, only to harvest it for parts.
He made a mech suit out of it.
There was a cavity in the torso—a bona fide cockpit—in which he could stand and control the suit.
Why did he make the machine? Because the Creature was bored, and it is said that boredom is the seed of inventivity.
A Piglet came along as he was testing it and said, "Utterly thrilling! Please, oh please, may I try your machine?"
The Creature said reluctantly, "Alright. Just don't do anything crazy."
Piglet, already climbing in, replied, "Crazy? Why, I don't know the meaning of the word."
Nervously the Creature looked on as Piglet fiddled with the controls. The legs wobbled unsteadily at first.
But he did quite well. For it is said that pigs are surprisingly intelligent.
Piglet could only take so much excitement, though, and dismounted shortly after.
While the two were enthusing over the machine, someone else shimmied up stealthily and got into the cockpit. Can you guess who?
Winnie the Pooh, local honey thief, found no honey on this tree. But since he had bothered to climb it, he thought he would give the machine a go.
"It is said," he mused, "if you can't find honey in a tree, keep shaking and see what falls out."
Pooh pulled at controls. Discovering these particular ones moved the mech arms, he deftly grabbed both Piglet and the Creature in one hand each—without crushing his victims by accident, thankfully.
Screaming commenced as Piglet and the Creature were swung around. Pooh
tested the rotation of the arms, the wrists, and finally the legs.
Unfortunately—or
fortunately—the bonsai mech could not withstand such vigor and began to
buckle at the knees.
Before the whole machine collapsed buckle by
buckle, one horrifying crack at a time, the terrified two cried, "Let go!" Pooh released them and leaped out before the mech finally
crashed.
Pooh lay stunned on the grass. His thick padding saved him as
it always did when he tumbled from honey trees.
The Creature and Piglet
lay sprawled too, but they were relieved to discover that it was merely Pooh—not
artificial intelligence—which had caused the rampage of the mech.
"I daresay . . ." choked Piglet.
"What?" huffed the Creature.
". . . the legs are fragile, but that's some fine articulation!"
"Hah!" said the pleased Creature, for it was his best prototype so far. Then he added, "And I daresay . . ."
"What?" said Piglet.
Two days later, the Creature began growing a new bonsai. The next one would be bigger. Badder.
THE END
***
The Bonsai Mech Suit is an alternate build for the 10281 Bonsai. Designed by eric_nunya, a mech maker.
The ending to this tale is lame, but maybe I'll come up with a better one someday!