As a
gamer, I was always on the hunt for a new title, a new experience. With Lego
it's the same. The hunt never ends! I'm thinking that contentment—and balance—may be the tonic I need.
Contentment is a choice
Contentment isn't something I've already achieved. Still figuring out how it might look in a Lego hobby.
What
is contentment? For me, it's a behavior more than an emotion. I can't
stop myself from wanting new things (that's the emotion), but I can choose to stick to my
budget of money or time (that's the behavior).
Hopefully, over time, the repeated
choice to be content might result in the actual feeling of
contentment—of being satisfied with what I have.
More than enough
Life is
richer and more fun when I focus on my abundance than on my lack.
I want
to enjoy what I have, more than chase what I lack. To say: "Wow, I have
this!" Instead of: "Man, if only I had that."
Dutch priest Henri Nouwen wrote, "We often live as if our happiness
depended on having. But I don't know anyone who is really happy because
of what he or she has." (Quoted from Life of the Beloved, 1992. Nouwen goes on to say that happiness comes from "giving of ourselves to others.")
I try to remember a few other things: The hunt is more thrilling than the actual prize.
Novelty wears off quickly. What I'm chasing doesn't satisfy
for long, especially when I seek satisfaction from buying something.
When I really think about it, I have more than enough to be happy. I've been very
fortunate! But being grateful doesn't come automatically; it's a habit
that one has to practice.
Balancing different pursuits
As I said earlier, it's easier to give up something when you have a positive replacement.
Likewise,
it's easier to be content with less in a Lego hobby if I
re-divert attention to other hobbies and goals. I need balance anyway; I don't want to neglect
other parts of my life.
Last month, I thought
about splurging on the new Rivendell (not to keep, but to build once and
resell). My husband said, "That's okay, but it's gonna take up a lot of
thought and time. Remember you wanted to use this year to write? Are
you aiming to be a writer, or a Lego reseller?"
Around that time, I also read Mary Oliver's poem "The Summer Day." It ends with,
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?
The poem reminded me that I have
one life on Earth and it is short. Not only do I have limited time
and energy but also limited passion.
Passion grows when I invest
time in something, and conversely passion wanes when I don't. I'm not capable of being very passionate about multiple things simultaneously. So when I work on other goals like exercise,
relationships, and writing, I feel less need to invest in Lego. Could this be one key to contentment?
Producing versus consuming
Contentment and balance in a Lego hobby also means being selective with how I much engage with different aspects of the hobby.
I find that reading about Lego, whether it's to check news or survey market prices, is stimulating but not relaxing. And never
satisfying. It only makes me want more: to read more, gather
more data, buy more. It feeds obsession. So I've been reading the news less, though I've yet to cut down on browsing prices for sets and parts. I tend to get caught up watching the secondhand market for opportunities to flip items and make a buck!
Instead,
I should do more of what relaxes me and gives tangible (even if impermanent)
satisfaction: building, photographing, and writing. Basically,
creating.
Of course, I think we need novelty from time
to time—which can include buying new stuff. But I've
found a real difference between the satisfaction of buying and the
satisfaction of creating. The former tends to be short-lived. The
latter delivers a deeper, lingering pleasure that returns when I revisit what I've made.
Ravenous or at rest?
This week, I debated how to use a limited-time 3,000 yen coupon.
Should I purchase a retired Winter Village set I've been eyeing (but go into 2-3
months of debt)? Or should I wait (and practice contentment)?
After
much thought, I made a choice based on questions that were relevant to my situation: Which option
will make me feel more proud of myself? Which option aligns better with
my principles and deeper desires? Which one truly helps me be more
satisfied, rested, or free?
Speaking of rest—and this may not apply to your particular hobby—sometimes, people engage in
a hobby to rest or de-stress. It's worth asking if what we do
helps us actually feel rested. If not, then what might? For me, the
answer is probably not "more Lego."
Obsession is like a hamster
wheel of stimulation and consumption. I want to get off the wheel at some point. Or there'll be no rest, no freedom.